i'm bitter, don't say i didn't warn you that this is, too.

well, i got through my monster work day and it was just fine. i'm glad i did it, actually. i made enough money to justify it. nader is kinda funny, too. like the way her sits there during debates, lol. anyway, i'll get off that issue now, i'm quite tired of worrying about politics for the week. i'm excited for this election, we'll stop being an unrepresented group with this one. so yeah, anyway, i'm excited to working on my last essay. it's going to be incredible. yeah, i feel like just kicking back tomorrow but i'm getting up early for a trip to the bank to get the last money i owe my parents from my paycheck and to put money into my savings account!!!! i'm super excited about this, i'll start making headway to getting to seattle directly. i'm also stocking up on stuff for when i move. i really can't wait for the moment i leave my house to move out there. i can't express how completely excited i am for that. the more i think about stoicism the more i like it and the more i find that americans really could benefit from this philosophy. it's where i started thinking about my last essay and i just can't help returning to it almost every day. it's really annoying to me that i can bitch so much about things i choose to do, i'm making an effort to stop doing that, i never used to. i do it to get pity or something, i guess, i don't know. but yeah, i've accepted that what i do and the outcome of these things are my problem and no one else's. i think it's stupid to burden society just because you can't accept your own mortality. i accept that i've eaten carcinogens, breathed them, been exposed to them my entire life and might die from them. that's really on my head because i've chosen to let it happen. if i get cancer that's my own damned fault and i have to deal with that. that americans think they have some right to live til they're 80 even if it takes going under the knife every couple of years is absurd. we may only have a short time here but prolonging it could really cause pain and struggle for the next generation out of proportion with the benefit of living 10 more years with a weak heart and half a liver you lost to cancer. so yeah, i'll leave this now and go talk to sara before i become bitter about it all. ciao.